by Larry Legg and Vanessa Summers
I fell to the ground, I became lost in a world of pain and confusion. Light
and sky exploded around and inside me: pain without... and pain within
- consuming me within an ever-rising sea.
above, I sensed rather than saw - my beloved Larry, his eyes closed
momentary in yoga-trance, preparing to face the unpredicted chaos and threat
to our lives.
held this final image of his face - resolved and intent to battle gods
and demons to save us, as I succumbed to the pain and dissolved into a
single muscle - like a snail or a slug, a thing which writhes:
organic, with purpose but devoid of sense and reason other than to be flesh
tube, bent on ejecting a piece of itself into an external world. Caring
hands tugged urgently to remove my clothes... and my last connection
with humanity was gone. I was merely flesh given back to a primal world,
not human - just molded frame - pulsing and ensnared by a 7 million year
song - a symphony to make every cell of my body dance in step and call
across the divide between life and death...
Obelia was coming across the gateway!
Let it rise now - upon the death of beloved
kindred souls, upon the memory of pain for lost lives and loved ones this
christmas. Let it rise now - a shadow blocking the light of our optimism
for a new year... a blaze of hatred against humanity and our time and our
sufferance in daring to live. Let it rise now as my Obelia is born, and
all my life and soul is there - hung as atomised droplets of understanding,
waiting on her first breath in my half-of-me's vagina - and let that breath
be moist and sweet, and not a gasp of beguiled & wretched arid air
left by the demon's whispered promise.
was there - bare and vulnerable on the hard rock... and in labour,
just when the bloody mountain exploded! It was not meant to be this way...
everything was wrong... badly so!"
"I'm here fighting in the moment... not just the urgency of birth... not just the distant threat of hot larva suddenly in the air again in Sicily... but something else: something old and ancient - before the word or skill of image... before man's mind! "
"Upon this tiny moment, on this piece of soil, with my beloved's legs burst wide and my daughter - there... alive... a head, in my place of comfort... in her - there is a ghost : A DEMON. A THING OF EARTH AND OF HELL... A THING OF HEAVEN AND OF SPACE AND TIME AND ROCK!
KNOW THIS THING WELL. It is a thing which cannot be vanquished; it is the
residue of life - the IMMORTAL clay without mind... all our demons.. all
our deaths... and all our futures!
... BUT IT IS NOT IT'S TIME!"
My obelia comes... my van is an earth-worm caught in regeneration... and the demon comes now in our weakness - let through by the eruption of Etna... and hoping to slide into reality beneath the cloak of our fear...
I saw it coming a year ago or more- in shadow and memory of life before.
I have the beast again then... here... this time... in public view... so
all can see the nature of the thing.
know too, that here today - it will die awhile some more, for I have been
this way so many times; and in change and ' strange' was I born to know
such things to stand here in chaos and know enemy and friend - and to kill
Come Demon - rise...
show yourself !
... and I have come to know the way of these things and I tell you now - I fear not death. For me - 'tis life enslaved and in chains I fear most.
This day, you come again into my life. Do you think I did not see you coming? Do you think from my softness and the way I was beguiled by you as a child that I would not seek you out when I was ready to face you.
I bet you think
you rise here now this special day of your own free will and think to surprise
me..? Think again...
I have stalked you here this day through not one life- but many...
... and now our misery ends for awhile: this time, I will kill you cold dead for sure - some 34 years since we first met in this life!